Happy Father's Day

My dad is a good man.

Through the years, he and I haven't always agreed.

He hurt my feelings a time or two.

But I always knew he loved me. And how do I know this?

He taught me to love reading and learning.

He taught and expected me to work hard and to be self-sufficient.

He served me and my family in countless ways. He went to work every work day, often performing dull and thankless tasks, so that I could have food to eat, a bed to sleep in, piano lessons and voice lessons, and fun vacations from time to time. And when we went on these vacations, he was usually the one to drive, even as the rest of us entertained ourselves or slept.

Sure, I can remember times where he lost his temper, or got annoyed at things that seemed so minor and petty to me; but as a parent myself now, I have much more sympathy and understanding than I did back then, and I pass no judgment on my dad-- or my mom-- for any of their perceived failings. And anyway, they did a pretty darn good job, even in spite of themselves. I hope I can do at least as well with my own children as they did with me and my siblings.

My father was and IS an exceptional man.

He sat with me and patiently walked me through countless complex math problems, explaining them to me the best he could, even though I often failed to understand and more than a handful of times ended up screaming and running to my room with tears of frustration in my eyes.

He took the time to gather our family together every evening to read our scriptures and pray together. We gave him a hard time sometimes, joking around or trying to wrap up conversations which were sometimes difficult to put down. I imagine there must have been times where he and my mom both dreaded that looming half-hour every evening, knowing there was the possibility of chaos and near-warfare at times. They must have been so exhausted and tempted to just send us all to bed right away (or at least go to bed themselves) without all the fuss of "family time."

He served in various church callings, cheerfully and willingly. And he always supported my mother in her church duties as well.

He gave me a Father's Blessing every year before I started school; he blessed me when I was sick, or any other time I asked him. He kept himself worthy to perform these blessings at a moment's notice.

Sure, he wasn't perfect. But he never gave up trying.

I love my dad. He is worth loving. And his love is worth desiring, and I know he shares it willingly with me. I am so grateful for that, and for all that he does.

Thank you, Daddy. I love you.

~Sylvia

What an Evening...

So, Nick is away again this weekend for a second installment of his Wood Badge training course. It rained here today, so he probably got rained on, too, up in the mountains...

I certainly don't envy him. But I do miss him. And the boys have been missing him much more acutely this time it seems that last time. Maybe because last time, they were kind of caught off guard by the whole thing, not really having been given much warning. But this time, they have the memory of what it was like before, and how long it took for Daddy to get back (he was gone for three days and two nights). And this time, he's even gone a whole night longer. So now we're on night #2...

The boys were all right last night for the most part. Z was a tad fussier than usual, and did say "Daddy" several times in kind of a sad voice, before finally falling asleep.

Tonight, though, around 10:00, the waterworks began in earnest. It didn't help, either, that Z never took a nap today, despite the fact that he had several opportunities throughout the day. So he asked to nurse around 9-ish, and I started to nurse him. But then I realized that he would likely fall asleep nursing; so, I interrupted the nursing to put him into a fresh diaper for the night (didn't bother with PJs). Then I started nursing again and he almost fell asleep a couple times, but not quite.

After a while, I noticed G looking sleepy on the couch, and started talking with him while I nursed to keep him awake until I could get him all ready for bed (he still wets the bed, so I didn't want to let him fall asleep in his underwear). I kept checking on Z and eventually he seemed to be mostly asleep, and I decided to try putting him in his bed.

Bad idea, as it turned out. Z started crying and wailing as he just laid in bed-- obviously tired and sleepy, since he didn't just climb down out of the bed by himself. But I knew if I picked him back up again, he would not want to let me go, and I had to turn my attention to G for a few minutes.

I told G it was time to get ready for bed, and then HE started wailing and crying about how much he missed Daddy, and when was Daddy coming home?

They both continued to cry, and I eventually did the only thing I could think of to do: I said, "How about if we all sleep together tonight?" Well, it got G to perk up, at least, so I could get him ready for bed. Z was still not consoled, however. He finally got hiself out of bed and I picked him up (remarkably, he did not ask for more milk). He continued to bawl as I picked out his pajamas and got him changed. I almost ended up just bringing the boys to bed with me right then, thinking we'd just have to skip the teeth-brushing for the night.

But, it also happens to be "that time of month," and I could NOT just go to bed without taking care of my own needs. This turned out to be a blessing in disguise, however, as I carried Z with me into the bathroom, wondering what I was going to do with him while I changed into a nighttime maxi pad. Well, as soon as I got out a pad, he was fasinated with it and finally stopped crying. He took hold of the pad, and I was able to set him down as I sat on the toilet. He kept holding out the pad to me and saying "diaper." Well, it does resemble a diaper, I suppose...

Anyway, I got changed, and Z was still complacent. So we were able to all brush our teeth after all. Then we went to bed, said our prayers, and the boys laid down and fell asleep (Z had to be touching my chest the whole time) as I sang a few songs.

So, now I have two boys in my bed. And it is quite warm this evening. I think I may end up sleeping on the couch tonight...

"Single Mom" for a Weekend

So for the past two days Nick has been gone to a Wood Badge training camp. He left early Thursday and will be home around dinner time tonight (Saturday). I want to say that these three days without him have been challenging and unbearable, that I am a mess, and the boys are a mess without their Daddy. But, that really isn't the case.

We have all done surprisingly well. Though of course we all have missed him, and will be joyful for his return.

The first night, Z woke up in the middle of the night and joined me in bed. He started calling Daddy's name, and wondering where he was as he was not in the bed. I had to tell him that Daddy was gone for a few days, and he got very sad.

We get to do this all again in a few more weeks (Wood Badge takes up two separate weekends).

I am very grateful to not be a single mother.